its been quite a while since he died but i miss him still so terribly.what makes it worse is that every night i hear the damn cat next door and i always think of him when i do.i miss my baby.so much it hurts.i cant even talk about him in the open.i cant bring myself to say his name out loud.it always makes me want to cry.my heart still bleeds.he died terribly.he did not deserve to die that way. he was MY baby.my tiger boy.i miss him so so very much.
its been a while since ive written…..been so busy with studying and going to jb n all…..anyway ive been re-reading god of small things by arundhati roy and it just broke my heart to read it again.as a mom i could never imagine seperating from my kids.i think i would die if that ever happens.just like when tiger died.i still cry when i think of him…its been about a month or so but i still feel him especially at night,soft fur against my legs….i miss cuddling him so much..it breaks my heart when i think of him.i cant even mention his name.i dont nowadays anyway.i cant.its too painful.he died terribly.he didnt deserve it at all.which is why i wonder why i had kids in the first place.i wouldnt know how it would be like if anything went wrong with them.its a big cruel world out there and theres only so much a parent can do to protect his or her child.its scary.i try not to think of it but it scares me when i do.i can only pray to God to keep them from harm and do the best that i can.as for my baby tiger….the wound in my heart will never heal coz i miss him terribly just like i miss apom and bruno and dol,cats who have stolen pieces of my heart.i miss them too so much but they are all gone.
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ok.this is my first time "blogging"….wanted to start writing a while back but didnt know how or what to write.however,lately ive been reflecting on a topic that has been forever turning in my mind.i know it might sound over-rated but i was thinking about religion.yes.the age long question…..do we actually need religion? do i need a religion?im quite sure i dont….lets think about this…..what is religion?what do we actually know about religion? where do we get our information about religion from?we get knowledge of religion from the various religious books that are available…these are all tabulated and recorded by the hand of man.i dont mean to sound blasphemous but its true isnt it? in the "olden" days there was no hint of any kind of technology so it was all hand written.furthermore,the information written was passed down by word of mouth…so how accurate the information taken down would be anybody’s guess. this is how i feel but as i write this i cant help but feel a tugging at my conscience.that is nature versus nurture.i was brought up to believe that i should not doubt the word of the bible or the quran(i was brought up with two different religions in my household)which was quite confusing to me coz both books have similar yet some contrasting information.i decided as a teenager not to follow any particular religion because i came to the conclusion that it was the case of-to each his own.every religion has their own set of rules and their own set of beliefs.basically all religions teach you discipline so that you would follow the "right path" and be a good person.it doesnt necessarily mean that if you dont have a religion you are automatically a bad person..sadly this is the misconception alot of people have.
